{"id":596,"date":"2021-12-06T12:20:42","date_gmt":"2021-12-06T17:20:42","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/wordpress.clarku.edu\/mat15-template\/?page_id=596"},"modified":"2022-05-06T19:01:33","modified_gmt":"2022-05-06T23:01:33","slug":"evidence","status":"publish","type":"page","link":"https:\/\/wordpress.clarku.edu\/mat22-owinters\/growth-in-student-learning\/evidence\/","title":{"rendered":"Evidence & Examples"},"content":{"rendered":"

One of the major focuses once I took my first class over was working on improving the way students use and rely on textual evidence in their writing. This focus came in response to the baseline assessment essay students wrote at the very beginning of the year, where we noticed that students were either not using evidence at all, or didn\u2019t know how to effectively incorporate it into their writing.  An example of one student\u2019s body paragraph is shown below:<\/span><\/p>\n

Prompt<\/span>:<\/span> Can the narrator of \u201cThe Tell-Tale Heart\u201d be trusted? Consider the author\u2019s word choice, tone, and description of events as you draw conclusions about the narrator\u2019s state of mind. Be sure to support your ideas with evidence from the text. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u201c<\/span><\/i>From paragraph 18, \u201c\u200b\u200bI felt that I must scream or die! \u200b\u2014 and \u2014 hark! louder! louder! louder! \u200blouder! \u200b\u2014 \u201cVillains!\u201d I shrieked, \u201cdissemble no more! I admit the deed!\u200b\u2014tear up the planks!\u200b\u2014  here, here! \u200b\u2014\u200b it is the beating of his hideous heart!\u201d\u2019 If the madman was not crazy to begin with, he is now. He was hearing sounds in his head, and shrieked! Any person that you know feels guilty at some point in their lives, and they cope with it by telling the truth. While the madman did this, he also went berserk, cursing and swinging the chair on the floor.\u201d<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

In this excerpt, you can see that the student\u2019s argument is not clear because there is no topic sentence. She seems to be arguing that the main character is insane. Her evidence takes up the majority of her paragraph, and she interjects with anecdotes to attempt to explain the quote. After many writing workshops throughout the unit, this student\u2019s work improved drastically. The end of the unit, students responded in an essay to the prompt: <\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAnalyze the relationship between Friar Laurence and Romeo. Describe their dynamic and Friar\u2019s effectiveness as a mentor\/paternal figure for Romeo. Use evidence from the text to support your analysis.\u201d A body paragraph from the same student\u2019s essay is shown below:<\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cAnother example of  Friar Laurence\u2019s relationship with Romeo is that he cares a lot about Romeo, and worries about him when he notices something was wrong. Friar Laurence says, \u201cTherefore thy earliness doth me assure Thou art uproused by some distemperature.  Or if not so, then here I hit it right:  Our Romeo hath not been in bed tonight.\u201d (Shakespeare 2.3.39-42) This quote explains that the friar saw that Romeo had hot been in bed yet and asked what was wrong. This means that he is observant and concerned when Romeo comes to him looking disheveled.\u201d<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

In this paragraph, the student has a topic sentence that clarifies her argument, and evidence is introduced much more fluidly. Her analysis is still weak, which is what we were able to shift our focus to later in the year. The following example is from the Exploring Adolescence unit\u2019s final essay, in which students surveyed the way a chosen stereotype was enforced in 3 different sources. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cCharacterizations of adolescents can be enforced in politics and impact youth. One example used to enforce it is from Senator Baxley\u2019s testimony in Congress. In his speech, Senator Baxley replied to a question that asked why we shouldn\u2019t talk about sexual orientation in schools. He says that kids want to be \u201ccelebrities\u201d so they come out to be part of the trend. He says, \u201cThat\u2019s what kids do, you know? Maybe they\u2019re in this club, maybe they\u2019re in that club, or they\u2019re onto this. And they\u2019re trying on all of these identities, trying to see where they fit in.\u201d This quote enforces the characterization because it is saying that teens are just trying to be part of the fad that is coming out as queer. The phrase used, \u201cfit in\u201d suggests that those teens aren\u2019t queer and aren\u2019t finding their identity but being the same as their friends. The voices centered in the video are adults, not the actual adolescents being discussed, furthering the idea that adolescents are not mature or capable of making right decisions.\u201d<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n

The growth seen in this student\u2019s writing is significant. Her topic sentence is clear, she provides concise context for the evidence, introduces it in a way that is cohesive with the rest of the paragraph, and her analysis is specific and thorough.<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

One of the major focuses once I took my first class over was working on improving the way students use and rely on textual evidence in their writing. This focus … Continue reading Evidence & Examples<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":703,"featured_media":0,"parent":591,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":{"ngg_post_thumbnail":0,"footnotes":""},"class_list":["post-596","page","type-page","status-publish","hentry"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/wordpress.clarku.edu\/mat22-owinters\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/596","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/wordpress.clarku.edu\/mat22-owinters\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/wordpress.clarku.edu\/mat22-owinters\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/page"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wordpress.clarku.edu\/mat22-owinters\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/703"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wordpress.clarku.edu\/mat22-owinters\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=596"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/wordpress.clarku.edu\/mat22-owinters\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/596\/revisions"}],"up":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wordpress.clarku.edu\/mat22-owinters\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/pages\/591"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/wordpress.clarku.edu\/mat22-owinters\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=596"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}